k sry, i broke my promise. i din post after mid-yrs. only until nw. it's june hols. a hol in name, but a studying n mugging period in actual. k supposedly. but obviously i'm still nt in e mugging mood. have been feeling quite down these few days... n e way, i found some1 blog ytd. a blog tt i've tried 2 look 4 in e past, but in vain, tt i concluded tt tt person probably doesn't have a blog. but then, it juz appeared miraculously ytd. i was searching 4 sth else n din even 've e intention of looking 4 tt blog. but i juz so happen tt i managed 2 find it. but at a time when i no longer need or wanna find it. it's no longer impt, whether i noe of tt blog or nt... but it juz chooses 2 appear right at tt time. n nt when i wanted it most. fate is really so damm sickening. it juz like 2 fool ppl n play around with them... so i read tt blog, n found out things tt i would have wanted 2 noe in e past, but is no longer impt nw le... those things have happened so long ago tt those feelings are numbed long ago... i really wish tt i've nv chanced upon this blog. i nv know abt this blog. those things tt probably i wasn't meant 2 noe. but i read e blog nevertheless. i forced myself 2 do so. n i realised n found out a lot of things tt i din noe. n nw tt i noe, some of them make me fed up, disappointed or "enlightened"... i dun even bother 2 link this blog, because i still think tt i wasn't suppose 2 noe abt it. friends huh?...
1st week of june hols has gone, n obviously i din accomplish much. i tried forcing myself 2 do my work, but obviously i still couldn't do it. wad e hell. i'm scolding myself. i guess i will only be able to concentrate after i sort out my thinking n all those messy stuff in my life...